It's not actually a goodbye

[JEN !!]

Hello everyone!

So, I've been pretty scarce lately and I'm sorry about that. Aside from life just being busy in general, it's kind of a hard time for me. In fact, it's been a pretty hard year for me altogether. I haven't been talking much in the c-box or anywhere really and I figured it was probably a good time to pipe up before everyone got the wrong idea and thought I was leaving or that I don't love you guys, and it's neither of those things. I love being here and I love all of you very much. This site means a lot to me even though I haven't been around or haven't been talking much. Anyway, some of you might remember and some of you might not have known me back then but my dad and his ex died last year and it's just been a shitty year due to that and plenty of other things. The year anniversary is coming back around again and I've just been getting more quiet as it approaches. I think I'll probably be like this for a bit until it's passed, the I'm hoping I pop back into my normal self again. If you do see me though feel free to talk to me in the cbox, I really don't mind it's just I don't always start the conversation. So anyway, I know it sucks and I wish I could just be fine right now but it's all pretty hard for me still. That's not to say I won't be around because I do lurk a lot, but I'm just kind of useless at the time being. I'm trying, though. Alright well that's it really, just know that I love you and will be back to normal (whatever that is anymore) soon I hope. I'm also trying to come up with another character that will be easier for me to write for because the ones I have right now, it's like pulling teeth to write a post and that's certainly not helping. I'll quit rambling now though, I just wanted to keep you all updated.

-- Jen

[Belle J'aime Binoche]

i am so sorry to hear that jen. you know that we all love you very much so and you can take all the time you need. i'm thankful that you shared such a personal matter with everyone, just so that we would not worry about you. i'm sure its quite natural for you to feel a bit detached and solitary at a moment like this in your life. after all the wound of a lost one(s) takes time to heal. it is a time for you to mourn and i cannot look at such things in a more optimistic way like some might say to do. i hope you feel better in knowing that we are all here for you, even if it is someone typing on the other side of the screen.

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