Holmes, Basil Lochlan

[Basil Lochlan Holmes]

this application is complete

Basil Lochlan Holmes

* tell us a little about yourself.

Excuse me, but can you not see I'm in the middle of conducting a crucial investigation? If- and when, if you insist on standing in my way with your mouth gaping- I don't add these chemicals at the correct junction, you'll have absolutely soiled thirty-three hours of continuous work. Please don't. If you do I fear my landlady shall undoubtedly evict me for committing murder in my kitchen. If you would be so kind as to sit down - Ah ah! Not on my armchair. On the sofa. Now then, I'll be back in a moment.

Oh da-- ah... good! You didn't leave. Fine, fine. Though I cannot possibly see how anyone is benefiting from such useless information, I'll participate in this little interrogation. I am twenty-seven as of January sixth. It was exceptionally chilly this year and I am most fortunate that I have no friends silly enough to pull me into it. I'm afraid your question of occupations is a bit of a tricky one. You see, by technicality alone I spend nights cleaning the university chemistry lab. The good professor is kind enough to let me conduct my more... er... grand experiments there, and the hours are absolutely divine for my other work.

Well, you see, what I really do... I'd rather not say. With a name like mine, it typically gets me laughed out of a room. Yet, if you absolutely swear by all that you hold dear not to so much as giggle, I'll tell you... I am one of the very few decent private consulting detectives in this state, and possibly even the country. You see? I knew you would snicker at me. Admittedly, I'm rather used to it.

I was born and raised for most of my life in England. No, not in London, though goodness knows their smog managed to reach us anyway. And don't you dare say a word about Baker Street. Honestly, does the joke never grow old? Anyway, I lived on an old family estate with my mother and father, and the absolute nightmares I am forced to call brothers. I attended boarding schools for most of my childhood, and when my parents regrettably met their ends(they were very old, no need to look sorry for me) when I was twenty-four I rather blindly found my way here. Perhaps not the best place to start building any sort of reputation, but goodness knows it never would have happened back home.

What a peculiar question to ask... well, I have heard people say that I look rather a bit like Andrew Bird, whoever the devil that is.

* what are some of your positive traits?

Oh, I think you might agree I have several of those. First and foremost I ought to address what you have probably already noticed by my very presence; I am, without a doubt, quite the intelligent fellow. My IQ is, after all, 182, and I always know more than I tell you- keep that in mind, my good fellow. It is a great aid in my work, to have knowledge ready and waiting to be seized within my mind's contours.

Which leads me to my second and equally important trait! I notice things. The tiniest trifling bit of information can tell me absolutely immense things, and so I am always on the lookout for information about those around me. You for instance! Clearly, the three stripes of mud on the side of your left pantleg indicate-- er... perhaps this isn't the best time. Suffice to say that while others see the same as I, I undoubtedly find and piece together observations that may seem positively trivial to the untrained eye.

Of course, I'm certain that by now you have gathered that I'm perfectly confident with my abilities. I know my personal limits well, and I act within them for the most part. Undoubtedly if I am thrown out of my area of expertise, it is only for the most trying of circumstances. I shouldn't like to think myself arrogant, but I don't doubt my ability to take action in the proper manner.

I have been told before that I have the gift of perfect manners, though as you can see in my personal environment I'm rather lacking in that regard. Nevertheless, when set before a client(provided, between you and I, that I take them at all seriously) I always do my best to behave as mannerly as possible. I avoid swearing, or temper, or any of that nonsense in order to set an individual at ease.

I'll have you know as well, that I'm really quite well known for my ingenuity. As the saying goes, I'm not a one-trick pony. I can get my job done by any means necessary, from negotiations, to lengthy inspections of the scene of the crime. I've even gotten caught up in my fair share of bar fights and other shady(and, if I may, excessively violent) situations. I must confess, in some cases I have placed myself above the law, and have, indeed, broken it to meet my ends.

I have quite a deep musical sense. Though, my favorites shall always be classical violin solos, I confess I have a penchant for most every genre I've heard. Except, of course, that vile stuff like rap and... eh... what's it called? Those songs that contain only exceptionally loud screaming noises. Anyway, I have some skill in playing the violin, which is my absolute favorite instrument. I have an original Stradivarious, sitting here on my lap. But not a word to anyone about it- this violin is worth more than this building. I also, of course, have a talent for guitar, though I find it hardly as pleasing as a good violin. Speaking of which, if ever I leave my humble abode for social pleasures, you can imagine I'll be traveling for a concert.

I know I may come off as rather abrasive, but I should like to think that my heart is always in the right place. I may have come into this unusual business by my own love of mystery and thinking games, but I have found that a great deal of my pleasure comes from aiding those in need of my services. I'm often the final court of appeal for unsolvable mysteries, and I feel therefore compelled to do my best to provide some glimmer of hope, even if I admittedly foul up occasionally.

* what are some things that you can improve on?

Oh, I had hoped you might not ask this. It's not exactly my favorite thing; talking about one's flaws tends to make them more apparent. Yet, for the good of the story, I suppose I must.

What I find people most often accuse me of is arrogance and ego. I don't believe that I'm overly, such, but I confess I do put myself on a pedestal occasionally. In my opinion, I am only as arrogant as I am more intelligent than the common masses, and my ego is certainly within my ability to control. I can't help it if I happen to know more than the next person, and you simply cannot spend most of your time correcting the mistakes of others without feeling a bit more in tune with the world than they are. Let it be known that I am more than capable of accepting my own errors... when I do make them.

I suppose... well... I've been told that... I... mope. Which I find perfectly outrageous! I confess that between cases I find myself spending a great deal of time lying prone on my couch, chain smoking and playing the most depressing notes on my violin... but I assure you this is my natural response to the monotony of daily existence. My mind cannot stand the loss of puzzles and cryptograms and all manner of complicated study! I find my depression hardly worthy of being called moping at all! Admittedly, when I lose the scent on a case I may become a perfectly dreadful person to be around, but... moping? Really?

I have absolutely no shame in saying that I'm intolerably unorganized to an outsider. I have absolutely no need for drawers and desks and cabinets to keep my papers in check. Anything that isn't on my laptop(I would be lost without technology, really), you shall find spread around somewhere. I keep the tobacco for my pipe in a Persian slipper, in fact, of the most exquisite design; a shame I lost the other one. I despise throwing out anything that could be of future use, so I organize my papers according to my own system, and they are in bundles all around the apartment, and I like to keep my bills and whatnot nailed to the wall with a pocketknife. I imagine if I took the time to collect all my fanciful and eccentric items, I would have quite a gallery to exhibit.

I suppose I must confess that I am perhaps the single most social deprived man on Earth. I absolutely hate going out, especially on social calls. I prefer to stay inside and play my violin, besides when I go to the university in the afternoon to start my experimenti-- I mean, cleaning. I don't have friends- or at least, no one I know of. There are occasional people that I might deign with a conversation, but otherwise I am a creature of solitary habits. Unless there is a mystery about, I'm afraid I have no interest for the rest of the world.

Fine. I'll admit. I am, on most occasions, incredibly rude. It's never my intention, though! I have the accursed talent of being able to shove my entire foot into my mouth without realizing it's there. Unless, of course, you are a client, I imagine I'll say something so deplorably unfriendly that you'll loathe the day you met me. I can make people cry, you know, without trying. I like to think of it, sometimes, as a gift.

* what's your biggest secret? we won't tell.

Er... well... my biggest secret? I have quite a few, but the biggest... now that is a good question. To be perfectly frank, I'm not at all comfortable with divulging this, but I should say my worst secret is rather personal. Or, at least it is to me.

You see, I'm not really quite as confident in my abilities as I let on. Oh, I certainly do have an ego, and I have no doubts when I'm on a case, but when the thing ends, I find myself considering all the possible times that I had come very close- devastatingly so- to deducing the wrong information, or chasing a false lead. I, personally, would like to blame my family, for you see I'm not the only intelligent one. In fact, I'm nowhere near the brightest child. That esteemed position is held by my elder brother, and the bloody brat never fails to rub it in.

* what does your heart want?

Why, oh why does this question always come up? God forbid a man ever possibly have interests beyond chasing skirts. Would it be absolutely wrong of me to say that I'm asexual? Because I'm afraid that's quite truthful. I have no interest in women- and especially not men! Women are the most deceitful, untrustworthy, pompous, pig-headed, loathsome creatures on this planet and I have yet to meet one that didn't eventually follow that path!

Urgh... fine, if you insist, I'll simply say that I'm heterosexual and leave it at that.

What would I like in a partner? Feh. Invisibility would be wonderful? Nonexistence I could handle? Fine. If I must be completely honest, I want nothing more than a woman of reasonable intelligence. Which, in my case, would probably mean one of superb intellect by average standards. I certainly wouldn't want one of those disgusting simpering idiots in a miniskirt and a shirt that might as well be nonexistent. A strong-willed person capable of holding reasonable conversation... ah... wouldn't that be nice?

Call me insane(I have been before), but I would find it remarkably dull to be in any kind of relationship where everything is "Yes dear", "No dear", "Whatever you say, dear". I would find myself in an asylum within the week. I am, at heart, an argumentative person, and I adore debating and splitting hairs. I suppose I would need someone that appreciates that, otherwise everything would go to hell in a hand basket.

As I've already stated, I have absolutely no interest in those many women that choose to disrespect themselves with clothes that better qualify as strategically placed strips of cloth. It's a sign of intelligence when someone chooses to follow the crowd by wearing a pair of pants that are so tight you can hear the denim screaming in agony.

Nor, as I also stated, do I want anything to do with perfectly docile little homemakers that have all the combined vocal skills of a chipmunk. I don't necessarily appreciate women that place themselves on pedestals based on gender alone, but I certainly appreciate someone that can and will speak her mind.

* what do you do in your spare time?

Well, my favorite hobby is either playing the violin or smoking. I do both for most of the day, especially when I don't have anything to amuse myself with. I don't regularly play any compositions, instead I prefer to string along whatever notes I feel are appropriate and to make my own tune. As for smoking, depending on my financial situation, it could be anything from cigarettes to my favorite, pipes.

Obviously I make a hobby out of deduction. When I'm looking out at the street, I enjoy amusing myself by deciding a person's livelihood and status in life based on what I can see from my window. Of course, from a distance there's a larger chance of failure, and that's why I often can be seen running out onto the street in my pajamas to accost innocent victims on their occupations. Usually I'm quite right.

I enjoy my dabbling in chemistry, and often set aside days at a time without sleep to work on my experiments within my apartment. My hands, regrettably, are quite mottled with acid stains, though it's not something that really troubles me for the most part.

When all else fails, I am always rather delighted by puzzles and riddles. Unfortunately, a book of advanced Sudoku rarely lasts beyond a dull night, and I find even the most difficult crosswords absolutely laughable. Still, it occupies my time when I have nothing better to do.

Finally, on good days I often go for walks. I may not have the most healthy habits, between my disinclination for sleep and food, and smoking, but I do get exercise quite regularly. If it's sunny, I might even partake in sitting in the park and reading a worthwhile book. Just so long as no one disrupts me.

* so what does your family life look like?

There is a reason that I left England. It starts with an M and ends with an Ichael. I absolutely and truly loathe my older brother. I had to endure a childhood full of his incessant bullying until he finally left when I was ten, and I cannot say I have ever regretted missing the opportunity to become his friend. He's seven years my senior, and as far as I know from my limited correspondence with him, he's still employed with the British government.

Michael was forever the family favorite. I grudgingly must admit that he is, and probably always will be my superior in intellect, and it was from his constant poking and prodding that I have these accursed moments of self-doubt. I believe he was equally jealous of my stealing his position as the "baby" of the family, and if I didn't know better I would say that he still holds it against me.

My other brother, Silas, who is fifteen years older than I, took over the family estate. I haven't spoken to him since coming to america, but I imagine he's still involved with law. Given our gap in age, I never had any sort of relationship with him, besides an unfortunate incident in my childhood that involved Silas taking the liberty of pushing me down a flight of stairs in impatience. I like to think I have more intellectual standing than he, but given our family, that's unlikely.

Given that I spent a great portion of my childhood and teenage years in boarding schools, I can't say I ever had much to do with my parents. They were old-fashioned, and thoroughly disappointed in my choice of occupation when I got up the nerve to tell them. You see, in our family, no one studies a trade like detection. Most of the family, admittedly, ended up in asylums and hospitals... Grandfather Holmes memorably died believing quite firmly that he was an orange. Lord forbid you ever approached him baring a spoon or plastic bag.

Yet the family had always taken positions in law-making and politics until I came along. My father was a cold man, and he took to ignoring me in favor of Michael and Silas. Mother was only just better. She assured me(in complete secrecy) that if I felt strongly towards detective work, nothing they said would matter anyway. She was right, but I had rather hoped for a pat on the back, or some measure of pride.

So, frankly, I'm happy to be rid of it all. After my parents passed on, I was quick to buy a ticket and come here to Walten, as odd a city as it may be. I'm happy here, away from all the nonsense of England.

* what are the memorable moments in your life?

Well this is a more pleasant strain of conversation! Three of the most memorable occasions I've ever experienced?

Well, the first would most assuredly be when my good(and only) friend invited me to visit him for a weekend at his father's country home in England. While there, several strange occurrences unraveled and I was, much to my own surprise, able to come out of the "vacation" as quite a hero. His father, a man that I found perfectly terrifying, standing at a menacing six and a half feet tall, and built like a bull, pulled me aside and told me in no uncertain terms that my calling was in the field of detection, and that I would be a fool to ignore it. It was the first time I had experienced any real praise from someone I respected so much, and I took his words deeply to heart.

My second memorable moment in life was leaving London for good after living there for twenty-four long years. I distinctly recall the very smell of the crowded airport, and taking the liberty to shake Michael's hand as he handed me my ticket. It was probably the only time I'll ever admit to feeling anything remotely kind towards my brother, for he seemed much more upset by my decision to leave than I ever would have guessed. Of course, he then ruined the moment by berating me one last time for running away from family obligations. I spent the flight in luxury, enjoying the first-class cabin that Silas had taken the liberty of obtaining by pooling some of his substantial income with my measly inheritance money. I spent the flight watching a documentary on crime in America, took a deserving nap, and by the time I awoke we were flying above Walten.

My final moment? Well, I suppose it was in meeting my gracious landlady, Mrs. Marie Judson. I distinctly remember approaching this small townhouse apprehensively, and in absolute disgust that I had managed to find not only a Broker(almost... almost accursed Baker) Street, but the apartment I had located was no other than 221b. I had raised my hand to knock when the old woman came burst out, looking no happier than she could have if a long lost son had come home. She gushed on about how long she'd been looking for a tenant, and how absolutely euphoric she was that it was another Brit that had come along. I was then ushered in, still having not found an opening to introduce myself, and was fed perhaps the largest meal of my existence, as she flew about, lamenting over my less-than-stellar appearance, and how she could "practically see your ribs through your coat!". It was the beginning of a beautiful arrangement, even if getting the rent together will eventually make my hair go gray.

* so we've heard that you're a lot like Basil

name:
Basil is obviously the original character's name as well. Lochlan is a callback to the unusual names you can find in the original stories. Holmes... well, I mean... He's based on Sherlock Holmes, after all!

play by:
I chose Andrew Bird as my play by for Basil because they share some similar traits(given the species difference x3). Bird is tall, lanky, and quite thin, as is Basil. They also share sharp features, and hey! Andrew Bird is a professional violin AND guitar player!

positive traits:
In choosing positive traits, I took into account that Basil has many positive traits such as his astounding intelligence, ingenuity, and confidence, that also affect him negatively. So I decided to look through some rose-tinted glasses for this. Basil also obviously has manners(though in a lot of cases he's rather lacking in them), obvious skills in observation and deduction, as well as talent in musical fields. And, for all his shortcomings, his heart is most certainly in the right place.

negative traits:
Arrogance, plain and simple. Basil clearly thinks too much of himself in some cases. Let's face it, when he's been outsmarted, or out of a case, he wants nothing more than to sit down and pout about it. One glance around his apartment on Baker Street shows that he has limited, if any organizational skills(though I took some liberty in adding a few of Sherlock Holmes' little quirks in there). Finally, it seems like Basil has no interest outside of his work and experiments, leading me to believe he's got a limited social life. Finally... well... it's pretty obvious that he's the rudest person mouse in all of London, even if he doesn't mean to be.

orientation:
Obviously you don't have much of a sex drive if you can sit in front of a stage with half-naked, presumably beautiful women dancing and give them absolutely no attention at all. Basil, whether it be because of his work, or simply lack of interest, seems to have no time for romantic endeavors. However, for all intensive purposes I took a stab at saying he's heterosexual, though asexual really is the better word. It'd take quite a woman to get his attention.

turn ons:
Though there's not a lot of indication in the movie, I figure someone as intelligent as Basil would at least respect a woman that's able to match wits with him. He clearly has an argumentative streak, and an abhorrence to routine, so it can be assumed that he would admire someone that's not afraid to argue. Finally, being quite a gentleman, he would surely want someone that respects themselves enough to wear clothes for comfort, not for following a crowd.

turn offs:
Clearly, if he admires intelligence, he resents stupidity(AKA the average mind). What would be the point of such an intelligent person trying to make things work with someone that just... isn't? Obviously, given his resentment to Mrs. Judson's behavior in the movie, Basil doesn't appreciate the typical homemaker types. Someone that just goes along with what he says, is likewise out of the game. And as we've already seen, he's got no interest in the ladies that insist on wearing too-tight clothes for the sake of being popular.

spare time:
As seen in the movie, Basil plays a violin regularly, and is quite protective over it. He also smokes a pipe quite often. It's not hard to make the assumption that, with a talent like his, he wouldn't amuse himself by deducing facts about strangers and passers-by. Likewise, in his moments of boredom, it's not much to believe he would turn to puzzle games to occupy his time. As for walks around the city, in the movie, Basil clearly knows London like the back of his hand, that sort of familiarity only comes from personal experience.

family life:
I really had to go resort to Sherlock Holmes for this one, as the movie makes absolutely no reference to Basil's family. I took the liberty of giving him two brothers, as in the canon(though, technically one was 'created' to explain a plothole in the original stories). True to Sherlock Holmes, his elder brother by seven years, Michael(Mycroft), is Basil's superior in intelligence, and they don't get along at all. O.o I don't really know what else to say about it, to be honest.

memorable moments:
I chose three moments that I thought would stand out. Once again, since the movie doesn't delve into Basil's past even remotely, I resorted to Conan Doyle for the first moment. It would stand out to Basil, I believe, simply because his occupation has become his life. The second moment would hold significance because it represents a chance to finally start building his own career away from the peskiness of family. The third... well... I found the very brief glimpse into the life of Mrs. Judson rather amusing in the movie, and if she tolerates Basil for all his eccentricities, she must have some inkling of affection for him.

BEWARE.

MRS. JUDSON FEEDS ALLLL

/cough

[JEN !!]

Thanks for joining the site. Please go to the following links
and make sure you do everything that they tell you. Have fun!

character list, face claim, member roster, other claims